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I built my first snow creation of the year yesterday–a snowman who actually resembled a bipedal man (roughly).  The snow was prime for packing while I was visiting my grandparents, so I created my own monster.  He stood on two feet at the top of a hill.  He bore no expression or features on his face.  One hand was raised above his head.   I constructed him entirely out of snow  but for the sticks in him to support a stubborn raised arm, and the stick that composed his entire other arm, which was both the simply and creative way of getting out of making another arm.  I went out to check on my snowman in the evening, as I had suspicions that he might have fallen; he was leaning already and I had seen cracks in his ankles.  Unsurprised I found his shattered remains gruesomely spread on the side of the hill, but I did not weep.  This art had more meaning than ever before.

I managed to take one picture of him with my grandparents’ camera, which I do not have with me to upload to my blog.  Perhaps some day you will all get to see it though.



  1. That made me cry Sam. (Not really.) Today I slammed my brother in the face with an ice-incrusted glove, but that’s the extent of MY “crystallized precipitation transactions.”

  2. I would have used the word “slap” unless it was with very great force. Was it?

  3. I hit him so hard that “Chuck Norris” would be a fair verb to use. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t normally touch the twerp (and his face- ugghh) but this opportunity was just so tempting. Actually, slapped would be a bad word because I kind of smushed his head between my hands. It was a double-sided assault, Mr. Swain. You’d be proud.

  4. Proud isn’t really the word I would use, more like pleased. I am definitely not proud of your spelling Cheyenne.

  5. Sometimes I wonder if she just does it to spite you. Oh. And thank you.

  6. No, I think she is genuinely ignorant of spelling.

  7. DUDE. Can’t you play along? (smile) I am sensing some spitting on the souls.

  8. That would be me, though I’m not the one with the spat-on soul.

    • That’s true…. and I’m confused and don’t know what to do … I spent all last night thinking and crying.. and just being lost and… I just don’t know…. and no I’m not talking about you spitting on my soul sam…..

  9. Don’t cry over not being able to spell. Lots of people can’t. Some people even enjoy burning my eyes with their horrendous mechanics.

  10. Aw man, Cheyenne… if you’re looking for solace… Sam and his blog aren’t exactly there to give it. Just saying. I’m not very good either. I try it once in awhile and… I end up doing something weird, like talking about caviar and eyeballs.

  11. Eyeball caviar? I could pretend to be distraught if the consolation prize is that!
    Degradation is fun. I enjoy criticizing people unceasingly. They deserve it.

  12. I’m sorry Sam, I would never hand over my eyeball caviar… IT IS MY ONLY JOY IN LIFE.

  13. What if I traded you some mostly-natural Sam ToeJam?

  14. That has a heckuva lot of marketing appeal. The question is… how much?

  15. Enough to make you sick.

  16. Hmmm… this sounds like it has potential. How much do you want from me?

  17. The eye caviar of four obese, red-headed children will do.

  18. Hm. Four children… assuming that they’re normal… eight eyes total… this may take a week to assess, Master.

  19. How long to make?

  20. OH GOD!!!! Leave the poor children alone!!! :O

  21. Cheyenne, this is the coveted Sam ToeJam we are talking about. Hmmm… It depends… Obese redheaded children are hard to come by… How much does Mark love his sister? I could fatten her up real quick; she’s a redhead, last I checked…

  22. This sounds plausible, but Madeleine, how would you even know that Mark has a red-headed sister?
    Cheyenne, I would apologize for deleting your last two comments on my blog, but I feel no remorse, for I did it with purpose; apologies would diminish my purposefulness. I now say to you, the world, that I am typing COMMENT 500!!! You didn’t think it could be done this year Madeleine, but look–we’ve barely dented February, and O, glorious occasion indeed!

  23. Hehehehehehe, I’m proud of the Great Sam Swain! Congrat’s 🙂

  24. Oh gaw, stop it now. Monosyllabic comments should not be counted, but I suppose the system cannot live to your standards, Master.

    How do I know? I am creepy, that’s how I know.

    Down to business… how much does Mark love his sister?

  25. hahahahahahaha madeleine .. sometimes you scare me 🙂 but your awesome 🙂

  26. Mark would totally pay you to make eyeball caviar from his sister. But you don’t need to kill anyone; just take their eyes.

  27. Oh I didn’t say I’d kill anyone… who told you that? Cheyenne? (Way to ruin my rep.)I just need the hobos to sign an agreement and we’ll be set to go… I think. (laugh)

  28. I never said you killed people XD what?!?!?

  29. I know. Sometimes my sarcasm gets too believable. (wink)

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