MLK would probably disapprove

January 16, 2011 – 9:56 pm
Posted in Bragging Rights

Tomorrow, MLK Day, though his efforts were noble and just, is probably just an excuse to get a break in between Christmas and Easter. (Presidents Day also is like this.) I wish no disrespect for Dr. King, and this act occurs tomorrow solely on account of poor timing and procrastination–I will burn my seventh grade home ec project, a pillow, for which I received an 88 percent B+. It will be fun, and not metaphoric in the least, with the possible exception of my bitterness toward my home ec class and the terrible memories associated with it.

42 Comments

- Madeleine
- Posted January 16, 2011 at 10:27 pm
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You keep stuff from seventh grade? NO WAY. I really want to know what the pillow looks like. Catching pillows on fire seems a little out of your league (smile)…
- Sam
- Posted January 17, 2011 at 8:34 am
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I’m sure I am fully capable of it. And, I would have deleted your comment and replaced it with my own because it’s the 400th comment, but, it being the first comment on this post, I would feel weird ruining that to be the first to comment on my own post. So congratulations.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 17, 2011 at 11:44 am
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NO WAY. Lezzgo. I’m sorry I had to take the glory away from you. Why don’t you just delete one of my old ones where I accidentally repeated myself?
- Sam
- Posted January 17, 2011 at 6:14 pm
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No. That would be wrong. But I, most certainly, am getting the 500, regardless. I successfully burned the pillow. I think it was mostly some synthetic plasticky material because is more melted than just straight up burned. But there were flames. Though there was black smoke. I might have killed a polar bear or 17 today.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 17, 2011 at 9:00 pm
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Wow. That’s deep stuff there… killing polar bears and everything. What did you burn it with? And where? I was hoping for an exact report and instead I get, “I might have killed a polar bear of 17 today.”
- Sam
- Posted January 18, 2011 at 7:09 pm
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I burned it with fire. I burned it near the edge of our brick fire-control ring. Fun stuff.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 18, 2011 at 8:24 pm
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Matches, lighter or blowtorch?
- Sam
- Posted January 18, 2011 at 9:26 pm
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Direct use of matches did not work, so I lit a bit of newspaper and set the pillow on it.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 18, 2011 at 9:46 pm
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You coulda gone all the way and used the FLAMETHROWER. That really isn’t practical though… I feel kind of biased though; in my methods of starting a fire, I didn’t mention the good ‘ole “rub two sticks together.” Man, but you’re SAM SWAIN.
- Sam
- Posted January 19, 2011 at 6:09 pm
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No tengo un flamethrowero. Lo siento.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 19, 2011 at 6:42 pm
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No kidding. Major bummer. Que lastima. I’d let you borrow mine, but the hobos sold it for weed. (I don’t know how to say that in Spanish.)
- Sam
- Posted January 20, 2011 at 5:25 pm
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According to Google Translator it’s “Te dejaría el mío prestado, pero los vagabundos que se vendió por la maleza.”
- Sam
- Posted January 20, 2011 at 5:25 pm
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And “lanzallamas” is flamethrower.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 20, 2011 at 9:17 pm
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Llamas. nice. And the title? Really? Wow. Wow. I have nothing more to say. Wow. I lied. (laugh)
- Sam
- Posted January 21, 2011 at 9:20 am
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Llama is Spanish not only for the spit-violent animal and a conjugate of llamar, to call, but also flame. Wonderful, isn’t it?
I typed that once and I instantly thought, “This is so awesome it must title my blog.”
- Madeleine
- Posted January 21, 2011 at 11:21 am
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If you’re at a party and someone introduces you, you can say, “Hi, I’m Sam and I am a Marine Predator.”
- Sam
- Posted January 21, 2011 at 4:57 pm
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I, at a party? Anything party with me would be a gathering of minds for a Scrabble challenge. I would forego the “hi” and probably my name and skip straight to the “I’m a marine predator and a Scrabble boss.”
- - theblogofthelost
  - Posted January 29, 2011 at 11:16 pm
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  Hahahahahaha I enjoy this reply 🙂 It made me laugh, the thought of you at a party refering to madeleine’s post XD
- Madeleine
- Posted January 21, 2011 at 11:06 pm
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You’ve never heard that set-up before? You know what… hm. Why do I bother? (laugh)
- Sam
- Posted January 22, 2011 at 8:45 pm
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You’re trying to assimilate me (something I learned in history class in action–wow).
Cheyenne left a comment somewhere on this website. Scavenger hunt to see if you can find it!
- Madeleine
- Posted January 22, 2011 at 8:59 pm
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No. I was just using a common joke. I like you the way you are.
- Sam
- Posted January 22, 2011 at 9:01 pm
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As do I.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 22, 2011 at 9:10 pm
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AH. Didn’t take that long. I wish my little picture was blue. I like how you criticize everyone, and yet you expect them to comment. I also reread a lot of stuff I missed. I honestly didn’t realize that Gabby commented so much.
- Sam
- Posted January 23, 2011 at 11:40 am
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Please don’t remind me…
I think the blue is pretty too, but I like my Gravatar the way it is.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 23, 2011 at 12:13 pm
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I’ve tried changing mine a million times.
- Sam
- Posted January 23, 2011 at 4:22 pm
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You probably could if you had a WordPress account.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 23, 2011 at 4:24 pm
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Uh. I do. It’s mainly my computer.
- Sam
- Posted January 23, 2011 at 9:10 pm
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Ah, I see. Kick it a few times and then either hope it works or convince your parents your life quality would be significantly improved if you had a new computer.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 23, 2011 at 9:16 pm
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Until I read the last two words, I thought we were talking about The Communist. I’m sure the same is true.
- Sam
- Posted January 24, 2011 at 4:15 pm
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Except computers can’t give you rabies.
- Madeleine
- Posted January 24, 2011 at 4:59 pm
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Touché.
- - theblogofthelost
  - Posted January 29, 2011 at 11:19 pm
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  TO TOUCH!!!! It’s french 🙂
- Madeleine
- Posted January 30, 2011 at 12:34 pm
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I didn’t mean it THAT way… (laugh) I would never touch the great Sam Swain…
- - theblogofthelost
  - Posted January 30, 2011 at 4:25 pm
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  Why not, It’s fun to poke the GREAT! Sam Swain … his last name always makes me think of a white swan 🙂 Sam do you enjoy birds.. swans perhaps ??
- Madeleine
- Posted January 30, 2011 at 4:30 pm
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White swan? For the love of pistachios- where did this come from?!?!
- - theblogofthelost
  - Posted January 31, 2011 at 7:03 pm
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  his last name it’s what I think of when ever I see his last name
- Sam
- Posted January 30, 2011 at 4:37 pm
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I love birds. I am totally as graceful as the white swan.

You can’t touch this.
- - theblogofthelost
  - Posted January 31, 2011 at 7:05 pm
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  No, you are not as graceful as a white swan, sorry Sam 🙂
- Sam
- Posted February 1, 2011 at 8:03 am
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Rail. Lair. Air L. Any other acronym for “Liar.”
- - theblogofthelost
  - Posted February 1, 2011 at 9:36 am
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  Not a lie.
- Sam
- Posted February 1, 2011 at 10:09 am
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There you go again.
- - theblogofthelost
  - Posted February 1, 2011 at 10:17 am
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  No.

Pointlessness and the Quest for Unreality